New Year Resolutions

So perhaps I am a little old, but I realize each year that there is nothing significant in a day unless you believe it is so and make it significant. Nothing happens unless you make it happen… one of Newton’s Laws. New Year’s day is just another day unless you want a change to happen in some way and need some excuse for that to happen. That is why resolutions generally don’t work for longer than your attention span. I believe that is not cynical so much as realistic. I believe you can’t make a wish things will change but refuse to commit to backing it up. I need to lose a few pounds, but vowing to stop eating or worse, taking a pill to make it magically evaporate, is pathetic and ineffective if in place of committing myself to improved health because I want to be a better, healthier, more energetic child of God. So, the resolution should be a deeper change, something which promotes lasting change and betterment. Something like praying every day, reading one chapter of the Bible every day, forgiving someone, wanting to please God, helping people every day, using gifts or talents to do good, etc. And we can make that change any single day of our lives and we must every day of our lives. I like how the singer Carolyn Arends sang it, “This will be my resolution, every day is New Year’s Day”. Every day, every hour, every minute is an opportunity to start again and be intentional. In fact, to be effective, it must be so.❤

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On Truth & Variations on that Theme

My daughter is raised to be truthful. Not that we always get it right, but she knows full well what is truth and what is lie. Her friend does not, she mixes truth and lies up together in a big bowl and dishes it up according to what she wants at the moment- attention, things, pleasures, etc. Sounds like half of society these days and me a while back, I confess it. So how is it I believe I am instructing my child in knowing truth versus lie? How can I tell? What is truth? Is it all relative, which is the latest fad of knowledge? Do we guess or reason and come up with our own truth? Who decides what truth is? How do we know what is truth internally? Why is there a truth? Aren’t absolutes square and rigid and boring and limiting and antique/archaic? 

I know and we all know what truth is because we are all created with live by the Creator of truth/One which can not ever lie. Our Creator can not lie, there is no lie in Him. And He planted a moral code in our brain. We can choose to attend to it or not for we were also given free will. But the moral truth code is embedded on our brain harddrive. Think about it. Why do we gasp in horror when someone hits a pregnant woman or leaves their dog in the car on a hot summer day or kill someone or rise in anger at a bully? Why? Did someone tell everyone this is bad and wrong, lying is bad and wrong. When we lie, do we feel good or bad? Think about it. Someone had to have done so. God pre-wired us to know it. He wanted our happiness because of His love for us so gave us the moral code of truth to follow to be happy. And He was generous enough to write it down in the Bible for we who are too distracted and self-involved to hear our internal moral truth programming code gift from God. We need to get back to it for our happiness and connection to God. 😄❤ 

Detoxing Our Social Circle

Upon firing from our world three people from our old band and their related toxic drama and constant negativity, we have detoxed our social circle and cleaned up the band. Those that remain and the new ones are uplifting and drama-free, just looking to make beautiful music together without the negativity. It is so relieving! First, we tried to communicate with them, reached out, prayed for them, prayed about the decision. And some people just do not want to let pride and selfishness go at any cost, so we released them. It was detrimental to remain in such a negative state all the time with constant harmful negativity and drama all the time. So we detoxed our social circle in this way and God blessed our decision with new, positive musicians and more instant energy and excitement about the band and gigging together! The house is lighter, the studio welcoming, creativity flowing. Change is rough but rewards are fantastic. What a relief!❤

Time for Them to Go

I have been an employee (probably never a great one) and an employer, an entrepreneur really. I started a successful audiology practice from scratch and ran it for 4 years well and only closed due to my divorce (or I would have had to give him half it’s value). And I and my husband have run this band we have. I have hired and fired people and both are necessary sometimes. 

I want to address firing someone who you have formed a friendship with. This is difficult because emotions and feelings cause you to retain them for far longer than you’ve any right to do and often the company/band suffers. And often the person is really ready to leave but for prideful blinders or other reasons they stay and force you to take that drastic step. Then you have a decision. Do I retain the friendship and destroy the company/band or let them go and hopefully stay friends but possibly offend them beyond reconciliation and keep the company/band a viable entity. Sometimes, because again of pride, it ends us being kill the friendship or kill the band/company. It is a horrible bind to be in. And of course you must pray over this decision. 

We recently had this dilemma with two band members who needed to go because they were bringing us down in a slow death. We decided to retain our band because my husband and I met in a band and have been together in one since and we can continue this mutual hobby. We love it. We breathe music. It is where God gifted us and we can play together and lift others up and nd the same time. So, you have togethwr decide which. Maybe the friendship is more important to some. Maybe the company/band is more important. It is a personal decision. But know that you are making that decision and you must understand it and weigh both sides with pros and cons. Then commit. Make a decision and just do it. It gets harder postponing it. Decide and go. And I am relieved to be finished with it. Now we can move forward and focus on it better.❤

Hope Beyond Lazy for the Addict

I read a post by a fellow blogger. He wrote that exercise can help people coming out of addictions. And I agree with him. And I am thankful for his insight because it did not occur to me that addictions in some way or another only arise in the lazy. It is lazy to choose to create a temporary high to handle pain or avoid life rather than have the courage and energy to face and handle it. And in reality, it is much more pain and effort and guilt in the “quick fix” than thr short-lived painful process of healing and the peace and joy returns after the pain so there is hope. There is no long term hope in the “quick fix” and in fact it compounds the original problem that took you there. Life is in the healing. God blesses the humble prayer and effort into healing. He breathes into it. He gives love and energy to it. He promotes it. It is always a choice and at any time anyone can choose to face and deal and not withdraw and cover it up. And anyone who needs help, God will provide that help. Because He longs for and loving, sober relationship with any addict and me and you. We are so very special and important to Him and oh so loved.❤  

Rebuilding Bridges

I am not one for burning bridges on purpose. There have been bridges burned unintentionally by ignorance or lack of communication, however, and I am sorry for those and have forgiven myself and worked harder at not doing so again. There have been plenty of bridges burned by others and I have long since forgiven them, of course (forgiveness is an offering to God). And there have been plenty of bridges I have rebuilt. It seems in life that God has blessed me with restoring these bridges of connection  to people I did not like much the first go round and He calls me to rebuild the bridge I would rather have walked away from and it became a beautiful thing. And here is the thing. We are all God’s children and every good Father (as God is the best) wants His children to love each other and get along and work well together. All have something beautiful or seemingly uneventful to bring to the household and together, God sees the possibility of immense greatness of His beautiful glory shining brightly through and from it. When people do right and maintain or rebuild connection, nothing on earth compares to it. Rebuild a bridge in your life today. It is worth the effort. ❤

Band Seeking Drummer

Let me explain, this is not a request for hire, this is a chain of thought on being in a band and level of commitment. Our current drummer has mentioned that he will be leaving us after the week of 3 Valentine’s Day gigs we have. So we will need to hurry and find a drummer for the Match and April gigs and so on. And this is not a dig on the drummer, as every person is entitled to come and go, we have no contracts. But I wonder why we have had four drummer’s in two years. We are a good, drama free band except for two drummer’s evil wives, one wounded drummer and one drummer who only wanted to play Christian music. The rest of the band gets along beautifully and the two drummer with evil wives got along beautifully with us too except, of course, for their evil wives. So is it drummers? Is it us? Is it a lack of commitment? All these questions. And here we sit with a deadline for having to go through it all again. Everyone wants Wil back (we miss you, Wil), but they say they will only have him back if he divorces his evil wife so that is no good. We loved Steve, but he only wants to drum at church. We loved John but again the other evil wife. We love Troy but he has visions of grandeur in a better paid band (good luck). So, we will do what we have always done… stick together as a band family and pray for a new drummer if and when the time comes and God bless us every one.❤