Been balanced lately and doing quite well. And don’t worry, I am at peace and in joy and love with God. Today, however, under stress of heat, too much sun, too much work in both, cleaning mom’s house, walking her dog, kids misbahaving, not enough sleep, doubling up my morning walk, this momma hit a near crazy today. God helped me when I asked, just wished I had asked earlier and not done so much, but such is life. I am forgiven. The thing is, I realized this one thing is still plaguing me. I blogged about it a bit ago and thought I had fully kicked it to the curb but I am stubborn sometimes when I should not be. It is great sometimes but is a powerful tool that can be used for good or evil. So, when stress is high and crazy is looming, seems like that is when old haunts return to further stir the pot and double confusion. I don’t think that is a coincidence. Not for one second. See, our enemy wants us dead. Plays a great, alluring make believe, elaborate game with us, but lying scum the entire time, scum that throws you away like garbage as soon as possible and leaves you for dead. Pretends to love and dishes out a hate dessert. This is why I (and we all) need to get enough rest and stay healthy (physically and spiritually) to keep our guard up and be ready when too much comes our way, which it is bound to. I am going to bed now after a long talk with God and be more ready next time. This life thing is a series of attacks and adjustments all and long the path. I am so thankful we have God and each other for help and support. Be the light! Love you! ❤
With all the renovations and projects going on, and it being summer, it is very challenging to keep the house clean. There are boxes, congregations of tools, paint cans stacked, extra parts that have not realized a home yet, storage in boxes that are too delicate for the heat of the shed but have no home anywhere else yet, etc. Dust, sawdust, grout even everywhere. I sweep and mop and the next day looks like I haven’t for a week. Such is life while going through the journey and transformations on it. This all being true, isn’t that what we do? We know transformation on our journey is messy, and we are so hard on everyone when it is not pristine in the process. Life is like walking straight through alternating mud bogs and pristine marble. You finally walk far enough for the mud to all be off your boots on the marble and then you gat a blessed three steps and you are in another mud bog and repeat that pretty much all this life. Me, I prefer being dirty is my problem. I want to feel everything, know where I am, experience the adventure. I am where I am and know it well before I move on, for better or worse. Well, perfection has never been my goal and I wish everyone had that lol (that has gotten me into a bit of trouble expectation wise with loved ones). But we need to do the best we can and keep going. Things are hard enough than for u ou to abredd to that by being hard on yourself. God expects humble obedience and worship but is patient with our imperfections. He knows everything and gets it. Do your best then rest easy on your journey today, my friends. You are so loved and understood, my friends. Love you. ❤
Let me address the weary wanderer, of which I fall into such category of late. Let me address those moments when the road does not fork or allow rest but simply ceases to be there, drops off entirely. Let me tell you that there are times, seasons such as this when the road becomes missing, either because grief is so great or unrest so great or confusion so great or so many great things as these. For some reason, the mind is overwhelmed, the heart if overfilled and the strength is oversapped. Immediately, while traveling down this road you look and the road has disappeared. It is a moment filled with gripping passions and intense feelings of loss and hopelessness. Sadness and despondency. Confusion and just really really deep pain. Does this make one believe in God less? Is faith at some low point? I say absolutely not. For God is a precious and perfect God of the journey and sometimes the road has to drop out for us to see something. Some thing is put in place of the road. It is not a road at all any longer. Instead, during this times of insecurity, what you need is a great big bear rug to wrap up in. And you look and don’t see a way to go, sometimes you can look again and before you is placed the coziest, warmest, most luxurious bear rug in the world to cuddle up in, warmed by the fire of God’s love and given as a gift to let you know that God’s got you in the midst of this owie, thie traumatic thing. Nothing is bigger than His security, perfect care and loving provision. And your job then is not to figure it out but wrap up in it and take a deep rest, drinking in deep and holding on tight. There is more to life than the road taking you somewhere. Sometimes you just need to be.
What finds me baffled is how opposite everything is from what is once expected in the spiritual realm than in the physical one. In the physical realm, you push an object to get it to move. In the spiritual realm, you let go of the object and it moves. Let me explain. I have had a troubling ongoing trial with someone in my family. I wanted one thing to happen, they wanted another. I worked and worked in the physical realm to get my way, to have it go the way I wanted, because of course I was right (and so was the other person, by the way). So, the more I prayed for my will to be done, the less done it was being. So, the Lord got sick of laughing at my feeble attempts, I think (in my twisted imagination, no offense meant) and gave me a tidbit of wisdom. This was to let go. Quit. Leave it alone. So, after several more attempts to not listen because certainly I was still right (tee hee), I finally gave up. I chilled out. In chilling out, several amazing things happened. First of all, I suddenly had much more energy and time to accomplish some very useful things. Secondly, the other person started relaxing. Thirdly, my relationship with God improved because I was going along with His plan and forcing my own. Fourthly, I broke through that pesky weight plateau because my stress levels decreased immensely. So chilling out rescued my relationship and God is good and life is what it should be. I love irony. I am so thankful to be given yet another chance to learn something truly important and useful. 🙂