Looking for People

I am not on facebook. I was and wasted a heck of a lot of time on it pretending to be social but only writing, never saying or hearing an audible word from people, never making eye contact with them, never touching their skin. I still miss the thought of being “in touch” with them but once getting off of it realized it was just the thought I had to begin with. Knowing the events of a person’s life is in no shape the full picture of that person. Seeing pictures tells only part of the story. And I had shared my number before getting off of it and not one person from it except my best friend, one good friend and family has called since I’ve been off. No calls even when I was on, truth be told. It is this false notion of connectedness in an addictive need to know formula. And that is dangerous. One has a sense of urgent dependency to be on tech to feel connected but it is a false sense of connection. My husband got back on just to wish his daughter a happy birthday, as apparently she cannot communicate any other way. Now that he told her, he is getting off again. So, I was looking up a few friends from my past and they only jumped up in searches on facebook, maybe on Instagram too and nothing about real life. And it brought them right up so good people or bad people would know where they were, what they were doing, see their pictures, etc. That is pretty scary to me, maybe I am cautious. But being off facebook, evidently I am weird again and out of the loop and old fashioned and definitely out of people’s thoughts and minds and realm of communication. So, I draw closer still to God who loves me and my little family and take comfort that God is always with me, even on lonely night after lonely night and days of family and band family that are still around and maybe a friend now and then. And I am content, don’t get me wrong, but I miss days of calling someone up on a phone that doesn’t play a role in cancer and just talk or meet in person. Ooo, ah. What would it be like if neighbors still visited each other. What would happen if people actually still had and practiced real social skills? Who knew technology would kill real committed human connections. Amazing. So glad I have God or I would be extremely lonely in this world. I am so blessed. ❤

Cleaning the Glasses

One of the joys (insert sarcasm) for me in turning 43 was a new, lovely (more sarcasm) fuzziness of things/words close to me. So now I have the luxury (yep, here too) of wearing reading glasses when I read or quilt, etc. Woo hoo! And one day, I put my glasses on to quilt and things were still fuzzy. I read and the words were fuzzy. So, assuming my eyesight was worsening, I started to be annoyed until I realized that my glasses had been smudged by fingerprints or some other obnoxious thing. I cleaned them and all was right again (or as right as possible having to wear reading glasses-Oy!). And I realized that we do that in life too. We see things flawed or skewed when in reality, we have some issues to clean up in the lenses of our minds. You see, how we view the world has everything to do with (directly proportional to) how much we clean up our hearts and minds. Truth is the great cleaning tool for this, found in the Bible, with a healthy heaping of love and prayer with God. When purified/cleaned, we see things differently, and our goal is to be so pure we see with the eyes of Jesus Christ. Then we understand what we need to do to help and why and how. This is a truly fantastic thing! ❤❤❤

The Key to Not Taking Offense

Everyone knows me now knows I do not take offense at the criticism of others. I see every person’s comments as personal biased opinions for which there is a rigorous but unknown backstory. Someone may say something rude but they did not mean to be rude, they did not have another way to express their lack of energy at such a horrible day they had. Or the rude thing may reflect their upbringing and they think it is normal. Or their car broke down earlier and their frustration level is overflowing onto me. There is a reason and I love people enough to give them that benefit of the doubt. Now if I am victim of it habitually, I will pull them aside and talk to them and apologize for any offense I have given them. This does two things: breaks the ice in a humble way and makes their bad behavior realized. It may even help them get to the heaet of the matter. I mean, who doesn’t want to be apologized to? Who stays angry at someone being humble to you? So the key is to stay humble and not take things/words personally. For instance, I went out shopping, I noticed the weird phenomenon that I turned a lot of guys’ heads. I thought I must be having a good looking day and that’s nice. Then my husband tell me this dress makes me look fat. The old me would have either attacked him or cried, depending on the time of the month, but nope. Not today. Not anymore. I no longer take the offense. I consider the source, he was raised highly critical and thus criticism is normal conversation, in addition it is his strange, twisted way of trying to help me look my best. It is not nice but I no longer take offense. If I need a word of encouragement, I go to God or my best friend. So someone may pitch you something offensive with or without realizing it but it is up to me or you to take it, accept it from them or not. Don’t take it personally but just as if they were trying to give you a present of garbage, you can gracefully refuse to accept it and say “no thanks, not my size” or “no thanks, not true of me”. Stay humble, seek to understand and you may help them. Forgive them and you help you too. Love you. ❤

A Nod to my New Look

So, I have gotten into a different shape, was always a shape but am more healthy and less round. Lol So today, we went to Sam’s Club to stock up for hurricane season like good Floridians, and two guys eyed me up and we’re looking at me and nodding and smiling. I never understood the wisdom of someone being attracted to a person just because of what they look like. How freaking shallow is that? They could possibly not have two spare neurons to rub together or worse, be mean. But nonetheless, I got a nod of approval today. It helps I got too much sun yesterday. Lol Of course, I care not. I find it funny. I am a grandma of a 3 year old and momma of 6 and 11 year olds. And I am still cute? Ha! Even if it is true, who cares now? I am married and he is the last. Anyway, thought that might amuse someone. Ha! I am still laughing about it. The little blessings of life, as it were. A good laugh being one of the best blessings. I love God’s sense of humor. 🙂

Perfect Toenails

I have friends, and I am not judging, that may have a bunch of kids and nursing one and busy busy busy but always have immaculate, polished toenails perfectly exposed to the world (as we can see in our flip flop/sandal state). And that is beautiful but and a nice pampered treat. However, just for me mind you, I find other stuff a wee bit more important than a weekly expensive visit to the nail salon for a pedicure. And while I have amazing feet and love them bare, I am more keen on function than aesthetics. If I out my family an hour and some hard earned money every week, I feel I have wasted money and time on a luxury I do not need. It does not improve our family’s well-being. My kids don’t eat better because my nails were done. Fingernails done is far worse though because that discourages hard work with my hands. Anyway, I guess I recently saw a momma care more about that than her kinda wild children terrorizing the place and got into people’s stuff while she gossipped  with the nail technician and played on her phone. I was just there with my son at the barber shop for his monthly hair cut. Crazy, I marveled, that outward appearance for some holds so much more sway than developing internal respect. If people don’t SEE a problem, though, they don’t have to acknowledge or fix it, so they ignore real issues and cater to the selfish side with selfishness buzz words like “I deserve it”. And that always drives me deeper to be reminded that God deserves our attention, worship, time, love and He REALLY does. He deserves us to care more about obeying than treating ourselves to more benefits and blessings than we really deserve or need. Just an extended thought. 🙂

Over- Thinkingitis

Often I suffer from over-thinkingitis, an illness of either great minds or insane ones, depending on the course of thought at that particular moment. It is my best friend or worst enemy, over-thinkingitis. My mind is triggered or reminded, depending, and goes hoggishly wild over that memory and what it could have meant, what it means now, what future is changed over it, why cats stare at you like that, and when to treat a child’s fever and when to let their body duke it out to build their immune system, with just a tad of I think I’ll add sage this time and see if that is better or worse. And it rages. My mind is ever growing, ever bending, ever searching. I became a doctor to follow my natural curiosity and would have done so anyway without a degree had I not first paid these people like a million dollars for the degree. I might have fifty doctorates right now if I had kept paying these people is how perpetual my train of thought is on many topics all the time. I don t speak of it most of the time because my psychologist mother will say I have ADHD, my friends would call me nuts, my teachers called me a brilliant dreamer, and my husband thinks I am an idiot for not being able to stay focused on one thing at a time. Trust me, you don’t want me to focus on just one thing. If I do, the rest of the world disappears completely until the job or thought is complete, regardless of time or hunger or thirst or anything. So, I am taking about it now because I am seeing more people with my brand of mind and over-thinkingitis. And I want you to know you are not alone. 🙂 And I want you to know that reading and studying and thinking about God’s Word is incredible therapy. Try it and you will see for yourself. 🙂 Love you!!