Past Clarity

Many can relate, I have spoken with many who get it, who feel me when I say I grew up neglected and criticized. My dad was my strongest supporter but he was rarely home. My grandmas loved me but one I did not see anywhere near enough and one was too busy and clean for me as a kid. My Aunt supported me but was married to a control freak and started her own family. I would have given anything for regular encouragement. So I got straight “A’s” for a pat on the back from school and volunteered for everything at church to feel valuable there. I cleaned the entire house, mowed the lawn, played the piano brilliantly, searched and searched for encouragement and attention, both of which I lacked. Instead I received criticism from my mom and abuse and verbal attacks from my lazy sister. And God gave me the grace to move forward. I decided at age 9 to be a doctor and poured into that goal. I wrote songs, played piano and sang. All searching for encouragement and attention. When looking for a husband, I wanted encouragement and attention and ended up with attention man who criticized and ignored me. God kept moving me forward. After divorcing him and remarrying, my current husband was great at first and now is criticizing me. And now my son is being raised with criticism. So now I know I am the problem. I must be unable to be encouraged. I must do everything wrong. I must be weird. But God keeps moving me forward. You see, I realize that God is the Maker of me. He made me strong to get this far. He made me smart to become that doctor. He made me musical to play for Him. Whether or not any other human being appreciates me or encourages me ever, I know Whose I am. I am God’s little girl. I am the girl He has forgiven and loves and has gifted to worship Him. I am God’s and He keeps moving me forward as encouragement. And if He is the only One I have, He is the only One I need and that is enough. I am content. I trust no human but I trust God. And heaven is not far off, for He will come soon for us. Then none of this unfair life will matter, it will all be forgotten, so long as we keep moving forward with God and saved by Jesus. ❤

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Sometimes I’m Discouraged

There have been a lot of issues with my husband coming down unrealistically hard on my son and myself, quite frankly, while he is easy and very loving to my daughter. And my son rarely sees his dad because his controlling wife is even more abusive and is not allowed anywhere near my son. And he is growing despondent and moody, as his hormones are kicking in at 12 years of age. So I am almost in physical pain for him. He can do no right in my husband’s eyes, even if he does exactly what he wants. And I am a close second to doing nothing right. So I am also becoming depressed and discouraged. And ours is far from the only story like this. So tonight, I prayed with my son and after he went to sleep I prayed and prayed. And sometimes this is all you can do, friends. It and reading the Bible is all we got. Often lately. So use these tools. At least do something. Pray. Read Truth. Pray more. And God will reveal what to say and the right time or He will work on the situation. Come, Lord Jesus!❤

This Prevalent Selfishness

And why should we not be selfish creatures is the argument, right? We are, after all, the crowning achievement of creation and represent God’s glory and genius. We who think and reason and choose freely. Should we not honor ourselves? Are we not co-creators, precious to God? Yes. Yes, we are. However, we are still, in all our immeasurable importance and glory, still the created. I can be waited on, praised, idolized, deemed valuable to society at large and never be more than the created. No one ever will be but God. I repeat, we have one Creator God and we are not nor will ever be Him. Worship Him. He is the important One. Be who you were made to be. That is glorious enough.❤

Don’t Count Your Runs

Don’t count your runs until you pick up the bat.

Don’t count your Hershey kisses until you’re out of the sun. 

Don’t count your grass until the weeds are removed.

Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.

All this is true, to be cautious and do one thing at a time in at good order. However, you can always and forever count on GOD. Never count Him out and always count on Him first for everything. He is the great provider, thr trustworthy One. He may be the only One. ❤❤❤

Hard Days

When they wear you down, and the days are harder than you thought they could be, know that we are all having those days. You are not alone. You are not the only one feeling pain and being insulted. But know this. The other person who shares the experience of difficulty, insult, pain, hardship, persecution of all types was Jesus Christ. So praying to Him about these things is taking your pain to someone who also lived it, understands it and loves you. And when you truly get this, you have a world of help and hope. So, consider this and know you are lived so much by God. Love you.❤

Keep Praying

The requests grow linger every day, just keep praying.

Your mountains rise from molehill made, just keep praying.

Drama arises to attack, just keep praying.

No more energy to fight back, just keep praying.

It may seem a worthless tool, but please remember God saith

A prayer will only be answered with humbleness and faith.

Combine those and present them high and keep your eyes upon the sky

And just keep praying.❤

Standing Up for Children & the Elderly

Children and the elderly need us to defend them, support them. Hopefully the elderly have family to care for them but I have seen plenty who don’t. Hopefully children have loving parents to look out for them but often they don’t either. And sometimes the caregivers are there but are so narcissistic and lost in their own cares and addictions and agenda that children or elderly are not heard or cared for properly. We have a huge problem with end times “lovers of self and lovers of pleasure”. And in order to care for someone else properly, we need to love them which requires a certain amount of self-sacrifice. So, it is of great value to remember that the God who made us is also the God who knows what good or evil we do, who we serve, who we value and will reward or punish us based on those findings, for all eternity. And we have a finite opportunity to produce for ourselves infinite consequences, for better or worse. And children and the elderly who need us is our primary focus and objective. They cannot get through life successfully without our help. We must put them first.❤