Random Mess of Thoughts at 2am

So, I am doing this losing weight thing, so I have more energy. Anyone E who knows me knows I already have a heck of a lot already,so here I am wide awake at 2am, mind racing forward. And here are my jumbled mess of thoughts for those of you who think one thing at a time and may not understand us busy thinkers. You still may not but here goes.

I really love how God can use the greatest heartbreak of my life as a tool both to tighten up and fly right but also that He is really all I need as my Heavenly Father. And in addition, I would never have found a new, respected friend had not life changed abruptly as it did. So we findmany new treasures and blessings within one broken heart lesson. God never leaves us alone if He wants more from or for us. God NEVER Lea es us alone if He wants more from or for us. That was worth repeating.

We are really enjoying the beautiful birds that have been coming to our yard and bird feeder. We have had a cardinal family for weeks now, blue jays of course (those wicked little pretty bandits), mockingbirds, woodpeckers, red shouldered Hawks, cattle birds (snowy egrets), and threshers are here most often. But two days ago, we were graced with a little chickadee, rare here this time of year. Happy girl here. 

Found out yet another of my friends with the alltoo common scenario where the man cheated on his wife, and I wonder where Godly men even are. Are they all a big pile of selfishness now? Why can’t they put down the garbage pushed in front of them to hook them and refuse it and man the frick up and appreciate the treasure before them? 

Patriotism seems to be passe now. Here. In America. My country so many fought and died for. This country with beauty and natural resources that rival any collection in the world. With amazing, strong diverse people from all around the world. We with so much to be proud in. Yep, here. Patriotism passe. Really? Those who treat this amazing country without proper respect and honor need to man up or get the heck out of here. If you exercise your right to disrespect my country, I can exercise my right to disrespect your behind.

I may repaint my bedroom. I freshened it with a beautiful seafoam green but I would like it calmer and warmer. Maybe I could sleep easier with sleepy colors. Lol

Today brought a lot of challenges, starting with a flat tire, long 1 1/2 hour each way drives with a spare, two patient consults, replacing 2 new tires and new baseball practice for my son, who the coach says is a natural. And along the way, cooked, did laundry and washed dishes. I should be exhausted but barely ate and am losing weight so energy stores are being released and I am wired.

Nonetheless, I have to try to sleep sometime, so I will make that now and say good night. Sweet dreams!

The Let Down

It is easy to be up. Life is a lovely breeze when you are on the top of your mountain and everything is wonderful, you had a great family day, you are doing well on your life’s spiritual journey, you are healthier and strong, you are free of drama or strife, etc. Anyone can do extremely well during those times. And that is most definitely why we don’t just have those up times in our lives. It is difficult to maintain up all the time. People in the rat race try and sometimes assist the up times with stimulants like drugs or alcohol or food or caffeine or sexual activity like porn or worse. Most of these choices are bad because they numb you and rob you of many learning tools and tests of character. We should desire the down time, the calm or boring times especially and even the rough and trying times. Why would anyone want that? Because that is how you grow and learn about yourself and prove yourself. Boring or bad times is where we show God what we have learned (hopefully) from Him and we reveal humbly where we need work and can ask for it. During the times everything goes your way, few people are contrite, fewer see a need for God or give Him the credit. We really feel Him and worship Him most when He carries us through those awful or tedious times. The day after the fanfare is a chance to rest and be reminded of our fragility and God’s contrasting amazingness to have given us the day and then allowed further development the day after. He knows when we need rest and when we need trials for growth and proof of growth. When you cease to have those times is dangerous because I would feel beyond hope, that He had left me to myself because chance after chance I failed the test. So I am thankful when God chooses to teach and train and test me. I am in this journey to win a greater prize of eternity in heaven with my God and those who love Him. I want to grow as close as I can to Him while here because here we determine our eternal destination. We have a short time to grow close to the Lord in our salvation. The day after is good. Every day is a gift.