Happiest of Mother’s Days!

Here are my kids and grandkids, who bring happy to my days and keep me very busy. Tomorrow, we take mom out to dinner. May all of you who are mom’s be blessed on this Mother’s Day! May God give you a day to just back in the beauty and happy of our children and feel revived for one more day. God bless you!😄❤

Mother’s Day Finery

So, we took my Mom out to Golden Corral for lunch last Sunday. It was her idea, because it was less crowd (no line) and she likes very few people around (lol) but likes their variety of foods, and one day is as good as the next to celebrate. And she has never been practical with money (learned that from Daddy lol), but she is practical with things like this. And she is right. What is an arbitrary day to celebrate something that is a part of who I am? Yeah, I know, not a romantic notion, but I am proud of my kids, I know I carried them for 9 hard sickly months each and gave birth without meds (rah!), and they are amazing people so I must have done all right so far despite it all. They both love God, love me and are doing great in school and life. Both are artists like me and both musicians now (piano first with theory then whatever they want). One is great at baseball and basketball now and one loves dance. I feel grateful for the opportunity to be these kids’ mommy. I always wanted to be a mommy and I am so thankful God blessed me with my own children. So one day out of the year to say, “Hey, you’re a mom” is kinda weird really. I am really not all that. I do the best I can but I have screwed up a lot and try not to but probably will again some other way. I fight the same balancing blended families act so many also work on. I try to keep everyone healthy but just got over being sick as a dog for not wearing a mask while scraping popcorn off a ceiling and sanding. In trying to make my kids more n independent, I always wonder if I and ignoring them too much. I teach them laid back and calm by exemplifying that mostly at home but teach them anger by erupting when driving surrounded by “idiot drivers”. So many things I do wrong. My kids see the best and the worst of me. But there is some good there, I hope. And in the end, I pray a lot and trust God will fill in for my deficiencies. And if they want to do something nice for me, that is nice but I would rather they obey. Lol Either way, I’ll take it and keep loving them the best way I can, as my mom did for us and her mom did for them and my Daddy’s mom did for them and my amazing Aunt did for them. I really had incredible role models of motherhood. I just hope the good parts carry forward. 🙂 Happy Mommy’s Day!!!!!!!! 🙂

A Mom’s Heart

I do not need anything fancy, in fact I need very little. I am ok getting the reject chicken cuts. I am ok cleaning up after the party. I am ok ser b in rather than being served. I am ok being last. In fact, I am better for all these reasons. My heart, a mom’s heart wants those she loves to be saved, successful spuritually, provided for, equipped to humbly serve God and others, and have the fruits of the Spirit fully inbedded in their person. This is my heart. My heart is full of this desire. And I reckon any good mom has the same passion for her pride/family. So don’t get me gifts, just show the love I have for you to someone else. Then every day is mother’s day. ❤

Mom, the Psychologist

So my mom is a psychologist. She is very good at being one but not good at working for a boss. And that is where I get it and why I became my own boss. But I digress. Growing up with a psychologist was quite a different upbringing. Every feeling or bump in the road was made much of, analyzed, motives picked apart like an amazingly thorough and anal electronics tech. Every strange look was scrutinized and parenting skills questioned, every mistake broken down to be sure it wasn’t passive agressive behavior sneaking out. So, I believe my family was mom’s first clients, whether we wanted to be or not. I used to walk on eggshells. I used to blame her for not being able to partake in small talk. I used to just want a normal mom. And then recently I grew up and God had a sit down with me. My mom loves me, always has. And she was who God made her to be. And I really believe she did the best she could with what tools she had. And how bored would I have been with as normal mom. I am not normal, never had one desire to be. I am interesting and multifacetted because, in part, of her. I can sniff out motivations and recognize behaviors in people because of her. And where I believe psychology explains away sin too often, I value my upbringing with it to a degree. And I firmly believe God can use any upbringing for His good. ❤

My Mom

My mom and I have had a lot of great moments and a lot of very strained moments all my life. When Daddy died, our relationship began to mend, mostly because we shared a mourning process. And I knew we are her only family here. And God has been working on my heart. Altogether, our relationship has become much more docile and close. And I am thankful for my mom. I know most people are thankful for their mom but I had abuses to overcome, to forgive. And with God’s help, we are healing. And I tell you all this because it is never too late to mend a heart. Never. God does not ever do “never”. I believe he sees the word as a dare. Lol But remember that our God is eternal and time means little to Him. So your “never” is comical and my “never” was just me lacking faith and believing lies and very comical. And God opened my eyes and allowed His love to pour into my heart and soul and mend its broken places. Again. It never gets old to Him and there is never too much attention to detail He heaps upon us in showing us personal love and healing for every layer of it. Do not give up. Give up your “never”.❤