So our grown son (from my husband’s previous marriage), the Marine and all around really great guy (maybe a tad biased), gave us the wham banger news that his wife of 4-ish years just left him for her ex-fiance of ancient past, the one who wouldn’t commit. Yep. We were going to visit them this week. Now, instead, he is moving alone out west to room with a Marine brother and a fresh start because he loves her sincerely and everything there is her. And I got to thinking. I had that happen in my ancient past… dumped for an unworthy ex after years of commitment and mutual love. And some people are a blessing in your life when they are there and some are are greater blessing when they go. It is impossible to say and realize that for about are year and that is are fact. Before a year is up, you only say it through clenched jaw. But how much worse to end up in many years with someone who hates you and has run you into the ground or stolen your freedom and identity and taken all your purpose to suit them and then threw you out or selfishly cheated. And like I was, he is blessed to start afresh and have us praying for him and encouraging him, and whatever God had for Him can be more apparent without someone half there and unsupportive. Nonetheless, as horrible as divorce is, sometimes you are forced to face it and change everything and that is never easy. So if you think of it, please pray for our son to find the path God wants Him now. God is the healer of hearts and Maker and Lifter of our heads. Thank you and God bless us, everyone!❤
I tell you, my ex was $3,500 in the hole on child support before I finally took him to court. The judge did not like him one bit. His smooth talk did not flatter her. His excuses were not appreciated by her. She ordered him to give a form to his employee to garnish his wages. He quit that job a week later. And had a good job and just quit again recently. See, he doesn’t really like to work. And here is the comedy part… he thinks work is beneath him. He thinks he is charming enough for people to pay him for his presence. Bahaha. But the thing is, my son has to see this and has to wait sometimes for things he needs. Thank God for my husband who loves him and helps with things he needs. I appreciate so much a an who will help with my son. It shows love to me that he is willing to step up and be the responsible father my ex does not seem capable of being. Nowadays, most kids are in marriages with step parents. Ideally, the parents stay together, but we are imperfect and sometimes cannot. It is so important before you remarry if you do choose to remarry that you take into consideration the love the stepdad has for your child/children you already have. And look how he treats his own kids if he has them. It is so n important your kids feel loved as much as you do. They can’t help it and already received soaking up and learning how to treat their future kids by the example shown them. That is never something to be taken lightly. Just a thought.
“Sometimes you have to leave to remain”. I wrote that shortly after my divorce in a song. It makes sense. But it took me a long time of drawing close to the Lord again to fully realize my vast failure in not completing the truth of that. This is long past and all is forgiven (by God and myself) and I am happily remarried to a wonderful man. But at the time long ago, I didn’t understand that leaving doesn’t always have to be forever. We can leave and get right with the Lord and complete that journey of restoration and regrouping and repurposing and get back together. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t because we never dance alone. However, if you want to work on it, it may be a good technique. Sometimes it isn’t all or nothing, like we all seem to think. Sometimes it is messy with spiritual discipleship because sometimes both dancers or just one chooses a different dance at the moment. Sometimes messy is temporary. When years go by, decisions like mine have to be made. We cannot dance alone. But my heart is for the single and struggling right now, and I want to meaningfully impress upon you that you are tenderly and dearly loved on a massive scale and you are never ever alone. If you feel alone it is a choice to believe the enemy’s lie because the truth is that the second you cry and call to Jesus to be there with you, He shows up. Sometimes it is in the form of a friend or family member or a movie or a warm peaceful feeling or holding your heart while you cry. You see, you cannot dance alone, but you can always under any circumstance dance with your Creator, which makes you princess of the universe. Pretty awesome, that. Keep dancing, beautiful princess! 🙂