Unknown Past

Unknown past, which beckons me find ye which never has or shall be. You excite my mind with a million “what ifs?” And befit my present with possible this or that or the other, a variable buffet or so many unknowns that could have happened this way.

Unknown past, with your cruel hoax of multiple forks I could have taken or awaken, could have hoped for, could have shorn. And alas, unknown past, with your sheepish grin, come. I have something to say to you, oh busy one.

You must leave me this instant and you’re welcome no more, no more will you be welcome at this soul’s mind’s door. For surely there is not a path I did take that is out of step on my journey, beyond hope for escape.

And God is with me on this journey I have landed, so plan it or not, unknown past, I demand that you leave me forever. God demands that you go, and I second that notion for past long ago would never happen how you say that it would.

I am with God and the present is good and the future is even brighter and clear. So past unknown keep your distractions from here.❤

The Plot Thickens

So, I stumbled upon the fact that my ex is operating under an alias. Might explain my off-the-wall weird dreams with him in them lately. Something’s up. The plot thickens. But since I am happily married now and have no interest in being in his life or get to the bottom of it out of curiosity and too much Agatha Christie reading. No, I will let this knowledge lie but what I will do is pray for him. We all do weird things and we all need Jesus. So I will pray for whatever is going on and keep moving and serving in my life. And this may just be a distraction planted to draw me to the past. But the past is in the pasture and you gotta watch where you walk there.❤

I Noticed

As I turned off all the distractions,

The cellphone, the tv, the music, distractions,

I noticed the flowers in bloom in the yard,

The sound of the birds and the insect’s alarm.

I noticed my breathing the fresh air around,

The sounds of my children speaking around.

I noticed they loved the look in my eye

When distractions gone, and they saw my delight.

I noticed the quiet, the calm and the peace

And talking to God was immediate ease.

And I noticed that life was much better by ten

And decided the distractions were at a permanent end.❤

Always One Step Back

No matter how your mind travels or how far you wander away from God, He is always just one step back. That step is a humble prayer.

Today, I am not going to lie, I was exhausted. My mind was wondering all over the place and it was really hard to focus on God. A lot of running and rehearsals and two back to back gigs, kids things, so on. I was whooped and still had two consults today. But standing at the end of the day after the kids were asleep looking up at the stars in the back yard, I finally could humbly just praise God. And He was right there hearing me. This is how beautiful our God is. His mercy and grace and love for us is enormous. We fail Him and screw up again and He is never more than one step back, one humble prayer. Praise God!!❤❤❤

Distractable Me

Always been easy for me to chase shiny objects. Not to own them but to study them and explore. That is why I went into science and medicine. I want to know how things work and love people- insatiable and most naturally curious. So distracting me is outrageously easy. And I realize more and more as I study myself objectively and study the people around me… distractions are the enemy’s greatest tool in his toolbox. It works remarkably well, I must say, and to great effect. If we lose focus on eternity and especially Jesus, we can be separated from Him so much more easily. We must always be soberly aware that our focus has to be on Jesus to stay close to Him- keep in His strength and the fruits of the Spirit and His rich, powerful love. He will not walk away from us but we sure can wander away running after shiny objects.❤