4 factors: 1. Level of Selfishness. 2. Level of Brokenness. 3. Level of Maturity. 4. Choice/Free Will.
Some people are just selfish and most are broken in some way. Our brokenness can be used as a stumbling block and/or excuse to do what you want for yourself to get your own way because it is all about you. Or. There is a better way. The brokenness can yield understanding and depth of character if one is humble enough and mature enough to learn the lesson and grow from it and grow close to God who can help.
The first group of people will never change until they decide to. And if we need to protect ourselves or children from them, then we must. The second group of people are the most beautiful and intriguing people in the world. ❤