Standing on a Precipice

Each of us, at some point in life, comes to a decision making precipice of life and stands there with a choice to make. For me, the choice comes after some very difficult and traumatic events, the loss of my father’s and two friends’ presence and availability to me on earth. So difficult to lose a beloved parent and two beloved friends at the same time. I have always been strong and I realized loudly I cannot control these things. And you find yourself out on a ledge, a deep choice before you. Do you stay bitter and cling to the past with a ferocity few would challenge or really understand? Or do you choose to live life as happy as possible, focusing on the good things and those who remain? Well, would love to tell you that was an easy choice but this time was very difficult because the hurt was so powerful, broke my heart truly. And a broken, feeling heart does not beat clearly right away. It hurts for a while, eyes drip and pour out tears of endless supply. Sometimes the weight is immense. And I all of a sudden today sobered up, realizing I will either be like this forever, a sloppy mess of a person and allow the enemy to win, or I would rise up and stand tall, realizing Who made me and Who never leaves me alone. God loves me. And there was the deciding factor. Looking at defeat or scootching on to victory with a positive outlook and God’s love in my lungs. I choose life. Every single time, I choose life. I am standing here choosing life, being given a new set of wings to try out my newly revived and strengthened faith. I am loved and ready to live again. I have this new wisdom, new chances, new hope in God and here we go.


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