Misunderstood

In my heart, I believe I am someone who tries very hard to be good and do and say the right thing because I have been saved from death into life through Christ’s sacrifice and resurrection. I know the great amount of sin I am capable of and have been a part of, so I appreciate dearly the payment for my soul. I believe I am worthwhile and loved and important to God because He tells me that is true of me and everyone He made. He tells me that quite plainly in the Bible. From the unborn baby to the elder near death, it is true of us all. So, because of my appreciation and love back to God and His Son, I do my best to live in service to Him and others. Despite my best efforts, sometimes without really purposing to do so, I invariably serve myself instead. It is not wrong to live life to meet your needs or desires, as long as they do not wrong someone else or offend God by it, but when we try to do good and bad comes instead, I realize it sometimes too late. Sometimes it is quite unintentional and I do not even realize it until the offense has been made. Sometimes it was bad delivery of something good or sometimes the other person wasn’t ready to accept it because of something in their life. Most people have their own version of every incident or conversation. They hear from their mind and screen the words through its replays of past experiences. So, something supposed to encourage looks the opposite or a simple question looks like an accusation. I know I meant to help but it comes across the opposite. So now, when I pray, I ask the Lord for wisdom to say the right thing at the right time for the right reasons. I do not want to be misunderstood and kill my witness or relationship or whatever. I love deeply those few I let into my circle. Very few know how deeply I love, and I wish to be able to express that more for their sake and the Lord’s. I don’t want to be misunderstood. It hurts everyone. I purpose to be clear and accurate. I used to be very funny but clarity has become more of a focus to me because funny would hurt people sometimes and I don’t want to hurt anyone. So, though often I am still misunderstood because my mouth preceded my mind again, I always mean to help. I am actively working on this and just wanted to voice that.

Extraordinary Life

Middle aged now, I have some friends sick, some have died, some are dying, others are healthy and strong, others truly just happy and others healthy but caught up in the rat race. I have friends that are parents and grandparents, caretakers, in ministry, against ministry and everything in between. The happiest people are not, ironically, Christian versus Christian, as you would assume from reading Scripture. The happiest people are those who have a broader scope of reference. Let me explain. People who have traveled more, done mission work, served people of varying backgrounds, attended social functions with various people, had conversations with a lot of different people, read a variety of books, these are the people who seem the most happy and content in my world. I am one of these people. All of these interactions allow for a different perspective and a greater appreciation of their lot in life and God and His world and people. Those poorly traveled, poorly served and poorly socialized (I mean in the society at large and not school) and poorly read have a greater level of narcissism and a much more limited view of life. These people seem less content, busier with looking at the other side of the fence, dissatisfied, more ignorant on what else is out there for better or worse. I believe God calls us to a life of service for His good, for other people’s good and especially for our good. We are His adopted children, so He wants us to have I formed joy. Staring at the same plot of land and barely moving from it whilst staring at a metal box that flashes pictures of everyone as beauty kings and queens (as if that ever resembles reality) does not yield a happy person. We are called to more, higher purposes, greater understanding of God’s creation which yields greater understanding ding of God and more meaningful worship.

Our Jewish Family

As a follower of the way of the Messiah, I have a strong love for the people of Israel. My Bible tells me so much of their history, it is difficult to not fall in love with these courageous people. I even love their stubbornness, because if that were not there I would have no hope, so even that has saved all who are not Jewish and who follow their Messiah, who is now our Messiah also, as their Messiah has adopted us into the Jewish family. We are all saved through these beautiful people and I love them. And of all my friends who are Jews have such amazing minds, either artistic, mathematical, scientific, theatrical, and all those things impress me. We as Americans should continue to support our Jewish family because the Bible states that whoever supports Israel will be successful, if for no reason. Our country will prosper as a result of our stand for them, God’s chosen people, so He promises and He never forsakes a promise and history proves its validity. Plus, as Christians, followers of the way of Love, we are family and family protects family. Also, as the daughter of a Marine, the terrorists hate Israel and attack them so for that reason we should love them and fight against terror on all fronts. Mutual enemies bond us and we should unite against them. Israel must be supported and they will be. Better their help come from us and we reap the benefits than someone else comes and they do. Purely fiscally, it makes sense. Morally, it makes sense. Spiritually, it makes sense. We must stand with Israel.

Less Than Ideal But We Can’t Sell Them

My 4 year old daughter’s newest thing that doesn’t make sense to me must stem from our garage sales. We have had three in her lifetime to sell off what they have outgrown and get pocket money for school crafts. Apparently, the selling of things made quite an impact in her life. So, her newest thing is to speak of “not selling” people in her life she likes and “selling” people who may be on her bad side that moment. So, I will get compliments like, “Mom, I love you. I don’t want to sell you.” Or in angry moments of her big brother not letting her destroy his valuable toy, she will pull me aside and say reverently “Mom, brother was mean to me. I think we should sell him.” Of course we had a huge theological discussion on the value of people and all kinds of things on a four year old level. But the point is that some people remain in toddler discard mode when something doesn’t suit them. Instead of putting in sometimes very little work or a few conversations, people will pout and give up and discard the person as they would rubbish and go about their own business like they are the only ones in the world who matter. And quite frankly, I am to the point where I call out this behavior and stand up for the integrity of life. There is of course the u born babies who may be discarded and murdered because they are sent to the world at an inopportune time or in an inopportune way. There is the school “nerd” who just doesn’t fit the “popular” mold and is bullied and discarded and discounted, the brunt of jokes. And there is the brilliant yet vulnerable young woman who was taken in by a man claiming to love her who abandons and discards her when he finds someone cuter or more vulnerable. And there is the good, decent American who stands for what is right and works honestly who is discarded as a pawn to line the pockets of the wealthy and powerful. Enough is enough. Why do we tolerate these people’s behavior. I have stood against many a bully and one thing I know about bullies is that they are all cowards, every one of them. They will fly or run if confronted. They will cower and lie if questioned. They will shudder if checked. They need to shudder for they are wrong. They should cower as they have made others cower who chose fear rather than confrontation. They should run out of town, out of America. People should unite and band together and take back our lives and country. Yes, prayer and fasting is step one but faith without works is dead.

Blended Family Bliss

Not one single person on earth is flawless. However, every single one of us has a delightful mutual Creator. He made each person on the planet, including every person He put in your family. All of us have damage in our lives. Some have a little fresher damage and blending families where everyone has a similar reason for damage but different ways of expressing or feeling that is the challenge. However, the hope is that whatever has happened up to this point in our lives, God has deemed fit that we should be a family together. And how do you overcome these hurdles? By remembering that we are all made purposefully by our Creator and that we are each and every one worthy of respect and compassion and care. The parents must lead the way in setting this example of mutual respect. To do that, we get ourselves right with God and healed and love people the way God loves us to the best of our ability. That means first and foremost forgiveness, even if it isn’t asked, even if it isn’t wanted. We must start by forgiving the exes and ourselves. Everything else builds on that key step. After that, as we walk the way of Love, loving others is easy because we ourselves know how very loved we are and how very much each of us are loved by our mutual Creator.